pacific ocean

Today I had a chance to go and sit by the ocean. something that my mind had been telling me to do for a very long time. I sat and quieted myself and focused on my breathing and counting my breaths. This is the type of mediation I use to do a couple of years ago and as of recent I had forgotten about, and how it makes me feel totally at ease. I tried to pay attention to the ocean and how that breathing the ocean into me, was filling me full. I let a ton of stuff go. I use to not want to talk about the meditation I would do. seeing it as somehow I was to "new age" or something. and now today I don't really care what people think and am feeling better internally. its nice.

I miss the ocean and as much as i try to replace lake Michigan with it, it will never be the same. hopefully someday I can once again live by the ocean.

It was really nice to just be with my mom and walk along the beach picking up shells and talking about the future, past and present. It was nice to be sitting in silence with her as we do our own thing. She is the one that taught me to meditate and to count the breaths and be mindful. She let me go and sit on the top of the hill and just do my own thing. Knowing that I needed to do that, and that was part of the reason I come to the ocean.

Its funny. I always come back to the same place, year after year. Its like I know where my center is and I choose to live very far from it. And when I feel off, it's because I cant find the center. And its too far away. I find it hard to keep this with me in the in between times when I cant get here. But this is what works for now. Maybe sometime I will let go of my place on the hill on the south jetty in Florence, Oregon. Until then.